When I was in high school I never left the house without at least a little make-up on and some kind of fixed hair. In college I tried my best to keep up appearances for all the fellas I was watching. On my mission I was homely but well kept.

I went to the store the other day and I caught my reflection in the freezer isle glass door. There I stood. In a pair of old scrub pants and a t-shirt I dug out of my brother’s DI box ten years ago. I had a twig in my hair and I realized my flip flops didn’t match.

This is all happening before I even have kids. In five years I’ll just be wearing garbage bags and duct tape. Its a downward spiral. This could be me soon:

That’s right…I could be Nancy Pelosi ET. Shudder.

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