Simma Down Now
Whew! I was ANGRY in that last post. That’s what all the CAPS were for. Now that I have a minute to step back and smell the gasoline I think maybe our country could benefit from the recent oil price hikes. Here’s why…in 3 easy to follow bullet points.
A Call for Reformation
For years we’ve all been driving around like “noobs”. Gasoline? What is that? We nee to invent a new super car that runs on the INTERNATIONAL FUEL. You know? Love. That right. I say with all this new push to make cars more fuel efficient we give up on gas and turn to love. I can hear the house hold “convo” now.
“Dear. We’re out of love for the car.”
“Dammit Alice. If you weren’t so homely we could drive across the country on one tank of love.”
But I regress
Bike riding: Its not just for Mexicans anymore
Yes. I propose we all take to the streets on those delightful two-wheeled contraptions called Cyle-doos. Or something. Biking is the transportation of the dandy-man. Large steel wheels move in sync with a street grinder playing the jovial tune of “Daisy”. Yes. Its a nifty time to be alive and on the streets. If you’re in a Disney movie, you weirdo.
Stay at home and read a…a…what its called? A book.
What a good time a book can be. You can throw it, eat it, burn it, sell it to you’re handicapped neighbor. There are so many things a book can do for you. So in light of these gas gouging times, grab a good read and transport yourself to a land of fashion and bitchy women…oh wait…I grabbed a copy of “RedBook”
So relax you whining whiner. Oh yeah, that was me
Gas doesnt gouge people. People gouge people. So take these savvy suggestions and you’ll live through this little national dilemma with no worries. And remember, if the gas gets you down, you get down on da gas! Please. Don’t make sense of it. Just roll with it. Oooooooh yeeeeah.